Caring for an aging parent or other relative seems easy until you’re in the trenches. Most families have the best intentions, doctor’s appointments, medication, meal prep, and daily check-ins on top of busy lives. It works for a while. Someone forgets to take their medication because their child is stuck in traffic. A parent falls one afternoon because the normal check-in was delayed due to a meeting. That’s where families come to a crossroads.
Hiring assistance is not giving up. It’s recognizing that by bringing a professional in, all quality of life will improve, even for the aging loved one receiving care.
When Families Can’t Be Available 24/7
This is what happens in most homes. One or two family members ultimately become the primary caretakers. They live closest to the aging relative, they have a more flexible schedule, they feel the most responsible. Those individuals take the reins on appropriate medications, meals, bathing needs, transportation, socialization, and emergencies.
It’s not that families care enough. It’s just that family dynamics do not allow for 24/7 senior care. Parents still have children to raise. Children still need their parents’ attention for school and extracurricular activities. Work still demands 40+ hours a week. Emergencies happen. When seniors require assistance multiple times a day, not to mention during the evenings when they may be alone, family members spread themselves thinly, and it’s often not enough.
Professional caregivers work in shifts. They come as scheduled; they get their jobs done and they remain on task without having to run home during an emergency in another part of the city. Many families seeking Home Care in Philadelphia PA or other locations find that outside assistance provides even more structure than families were able to maintain.
When families can have trained professionals handle daily routines, their relationships improve as they aren’t constantly bogged down by responsibilities associated with aging parents.
When Families Don’t Have Expertise
Sometimes an aging loved one needs help due to very specific medical conditions. They can’t just have anyone caring for them without knowledge of the disease state and how it impacts their daily care.
For example, someone with diabetes may require blood sugar testing at specific times; a stroke victim may require particular transfer resources so both parties don’t hurt themselves; dementia may need special patience and skills with which many people don’t possess naturally.
While family members can learn these skills, it takes time. Professional caregivers come trained with this information. They can identify precursors to infection, dehydration, pressure sores, and side effects of medications, all through years of experience or schooling. They know how to lift and shift without injuring themselves and have found special attention and resources to hundreds of clients before.
Furthermore, the more experience someone has with generalized situations, the better they can help avoid complications. If someone has cared for someone with dementia hundreds of times before, they’re used to what is “normal” for that person versus what requires attention. Professionals note variances better than exhausted family members who no longer recognize concerns because they’re overwhelmed themselves.
When Caregiver Burnout Happens
Caregiver burnout happens gradually, but when it does, it’s life changing. It starts with fatigue; then people get irritated at small things. This irritability transforms into resentment toward caretaking efforts or family members who need help. Eventually, anxiety and depression ensue, or worse, physical problems.
Statistically, anyone who becomes an informal family caregiver has higher depressive symptoms and physical ailments than anyone who does not participate in caregiving efforts.
Care is compromised when family caregivers are exhausted. People may become frustrated with difficult situations or mediations between their dementia-riddled loved ones. They may let tasks slide because they aren’t as important as family members assumed once due to time constraints. They might even give up entirely if their loved one’s condition is worse than they assumed, recognizing they no longer care enough because they have gone down the rabbit hole themselves.
Professional caregivers come to work refreshed on shift. They’re not caregivers responsible for taking care of their teenagers after school or navigating a demanding career of 40+ hours a week to pay their bills, all while trying to find time for their well-being in addition to their relatives. They’re focused on the task at hand with their independent stresses controlled before or after shifts.
When the Family Relationship Changes
This is perhaps the most crucial consideration when determining if hired help is necessary or beneficial for all. When children become adult children’s primary caregivers for their senior parents, everything changes. The parent who once cared for their child now needs help caring for the intimate aspects of life: bathing, toileting needs, dressing them. When shifting roles become even more uncomfortable.
Many seniors refuse help from their children or grandchildren because they don’t want to burden them or change how children see them (and vice versa). Yet seniors may accept more help from a professional caregiver with whom they’ve never spent decades developing history.
Once professional caregivers handle the personal aspects of daily care with seniors, family members can become family members again. They can come by to visit without having to mediate medication management or personal care efforts but instead sit down over meals, watch TV with them or go out for ice cream or other socialization efforts.
Family visits become more about connection than constant task assessments.
How Families Can Participate
Hiring outside assistance does not mean families exit the situation entirely. Most successful dynamics feature caregivers maintaining daily care while family members maintain oversight, involvement in quality time, and decision-making responsibilities.
Hired outside help does not need to remove familial participation; instead, it shows compassion toward those aging relatives who finally need assistance but not at the cost of familial satisfaction as everyone transitions into the next chapter of life.
